Friday, September 17, 2004
Link of the day: Send Andrea to College!
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Rollin' rollin' rollin'
Baba Mohan Das, an Indian holy man, is rolling on down the highways and byways to meet up with President Pervez Musharraf. I mean it. He's rolling. 600 miles. Bumpity bump bump bump. Till he rolls right into Musharraf's doorway.
Baba has been called the Rolling Saint for ages because for years he's been rolling on the roadways, logging thousands of miles across India.
Says Baba (who won't eat during his rolls, only sips water and smokes cigarettes): "I am doing this rolling pilgrimage for world peace, end of terrorism and friendly relations between India and Pakistan."
Um. I'm moved to peace, how's about you?
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Verdict in Extreme Golfing Trial
James A Tomkins was whopped in the face by a golf ball back in 1999 at the Cumberland Golf Course in PA. The ball hit him so hard that he fell out of his golf cart. Ouch! Jimmy pressed charges against fellow golfer George Long, claiming that the injury was caused because George didn't bellow "Fore!"
It went to trial in Carlisle, PA, and the jury voted in favor of.......GEORGE!
As Georgie boy says, "When you play golf, you take a risk."
Ain't it the truth?
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Witch Invasion in Wilkes-Barre, PA!
Jake Jenkins and his family (wife and 8 kids ranging from 1 - 22 years old) have had it with the witches in their neighborhood. The witches who are out to get him. So Jake has made his 2 story home into a virtual bunker, hung a ghostbusters poster with a witch drawn instead of a ghost, surrounded his yard with protective plastic orange fencing, and has put an efficient evil-blocking totem of sorts in his front yard.
There he has a tree stump, into which he has stabbed wooden stakes: 9 are pointing up to the sky, and 7 jut out around the sides of the stump. "It's a map of the neighborhood," Jenkins said. "Each spike points to where a witch lives...There's a whole bunch that live up there," says Jake, pointing north up Waller Street.
Jake described his neighbors:
"The one up there, she drinks human blood,"
"The one ... there, she's the real high-level witch, but she's real slick."
Jake says that the cops know all about the evil witches on his block, but Police Chief Gerry Dessoye told reporters: "No one has come to me and said we have a problem with witches on Waller Street."
Neighbors also haven't noticed all the evil witches. Perhaps Chris Foote, who lives across the street from Jake, summed it up best when asked what he thought of the stump: "I don't really know what the deal is with that. They've always been weird, so I really thought nothing of it."
Jake's official comment: "I'm no fool."
--this story has quotes from the Times Leader
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Going Out of Business
Sorry to tell you, Bo Baokun's thriving 'rent a tiger' business has been shut down. Bo lives in a little village near Shenyang (China), and he's been renting out tigers that he raised from cubs. In his apartment.
He would have been fine, but he ignored his scaredy cat neighbors when they asked him to please keep his kitties someplace else. So they called the cops and had them forcibly removed and now he's in trouble with the law.
Whoops!
Another fine venture down the drain.
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Man Tries to Sue Wife for 5-Day Sex Denial
Some middle aged Spanish guy has been getting the 'not tonight, honey, I have a headache' treatment from his wife a bit too much for his tastes. In fact, he just attempted to have her charged with Domestic Abuse due to her degrading refusals to pleasure him for 5 consecutive DAYS in a row.
The judge dismissed the case.
Bwah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
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Rollin' rollin' rollin'
Baba Mohan Das, an Indian holy man, is rolling on down the highways and byways to meet up with President Pervez Musharraf. I mean it. He's rolling. 600 miles. Bumpity bump bump bump. Till he rolls right into Musharraf's doorway.
Baba has been called the Rolling Saint for ages because for years he's been rolling on the roadways, logging thousands of miles across India.
Says Baba (who won't eat during his rolls, only sips water and smokes cigarettes): "I am doing this rolling pilgrimage for world peace, end of terrorism and friendly relations between India and Pakistan."
Um. I'm moved to peace, how's about you?
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Verdict in Extreme Golfing Trial
James A Tomkins was whopped in the face by a golf ball back in 1999 at the Cumberland Golf Course in PA. The ball hit him so hard that he fell out of his golf cart. Ouch! Jimmy pressed charges against fellow golfer George Long, claiming that the injury was caused because George didn't bellow "Fore!"
It went to trial in Carlisle, PA, and the jury voted in favor of.......GEORGE!
As Georgie boy says, "When you play golf, you take a risk."
Ain't it the truth?
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Witch Invasion in Wilkes-Barre, PA!
Jake Jenkins and his family (wife and 8 kids ranging from 1 - 22 years old) have had it with the witches in their neighborhood. The witches who are out to get him. So Jake has made his 2 story home into a virtual bunker, hung a ghostbusters poster with a witch drawn instead of a ghost, surrounded his yard with protective plastic orange fencing, and has put an efficient evil-blocking totem of sorts in his front yard.
There he has a tree stump, into which he has stabbed wooden stakes: 9 are pointing up to the sky, and 7 jut out around the sides of the stump. "It's a map of the neighborhood," Jenkins said. "Each spike points to where a witch lives...There's a whole bunch that live up there," says Jake, pointing north up Waller Street.
Jake described his neighbors:
"The one up there, she drinks human blood,"
"The one ... there, she's the real high-level witch, but she's real slick."
Jake says that the cops know all about the evil witches on his block, but Police Chief Gerry Dessoye told reporters: "No one has come to me and said we have a problem with witches on Waller Street."
Neighbors also haven't noticed all the evil witches. Perhaps Chris Foote, who lives across the street from Jake, summed it up best when asked what he thought of the stump: "I don't really know what the deal is with that. They've always been weird, so I really thought nothing of it."
Jake's official comment: "I'm no fool."
--this story has quotes from the Times Leader
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Going Out of Business
Sorry to tell you, Bo Baokun's thriving 'rent a tiger' business has been shut down. Bo lives in a little village near Shenyang (China), and he's been renting out tigers that he raised from cubs. In his apartment.
He would have been fine, but he ignored his scaredy cat neighbors when they asked him to please keep his kitties someplace else. So they called the cops and had them forcibly removed and now he's in trouble with the law.
Whoops!
Another fine venture down the drain.
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Man Tries to Sue Wife for 5-Day Sex Denial
Some middle aged Spanish guy has been getting the 'not tonight, honey, I have a headache' treatment from his wife a bit too much for his tastes. In fact, he just attempted to have her charged with Domestic Abuse due to her degrading refusals to pleasure him for 5 consecutive DAYS in a row.
The judge dismissed the case.
Bwah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
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