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Thursday, March 03, 2005

Today in History: Mar 3 1931 An English beer drinking song becomes the National Anthem of the United States.

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Link of the day: Link of the day: a
fun game provided by the incomparable Lord Mutter. As the Lord, Mutter, states: it is a nifty diversion and more importantly, safe for work!


And a bonus link for you: information about the subterrainian alien nation, and the covert take over of planet earth!
http://www.subversiveelement.com/Dulce_Index.html
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From one of my favorite boobs, Harold "Milk it for all you can" Friedline:

The Perfect Mother's Day Present

You can get anything on eBay, and why not take advantage of that when searching for that special something for your special woman?

Right now on eBay you may bid on
one of Tawny Peaks' old silicone implants! The wonderful 69-HH boobie enhancer can be yours, if you get your bid in quickly enough.

Tawny had them removed after she was sued in 1998 for whopping a guy in the face with the bodacious ta-tas during a bachelor party. Dude suffered whiplash from the force of the bajumbas, saying at the time that they felt "like two cement blocks".

Tawny and her titties were cleared of charges after a female bailiff from "The People's Court" inspected the lopes and found them to actually be quite soft and only about 2lbs apiece. They were therefore judged to not be dangerous.

Though you can only bid on one implant (Tawny is keeping the other for sentimental reasons), what better way to tell the woman in your life that she's a boob and you love her?
Auction ends Saturday.


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You Stink!

Eight years ago Mina, from Iran, married a wonderful man. A bit of a clean freak he was ~ showering 3 times a day and washing his hands repeatedly. But it was okay, and they were blissful.

Then over a year ago "he suddenly changed" and swore off soap and water. Dude hasn't bathed in over a year and, frankly, stinks. Mina has therefore asked for a divorce.

As Mina said in court during her divorce hearing: "My husband says he does not like water and does not want to take a shower ... He doesn't even wash his face when he wakes up in the morning... Now nobody, including me, my children and his colleagues, can stand him."
No telling if she'll get her wish to divorce: usually in Iran, women don't get granted divorces for their hubbies being stinky.


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Chilly Chile Dress Code

El Trolley bar in Valparaiso, Chile, has a great uniform for its waitresses: body paint and thongs. The brainchild of photographer Hube Salamanca, all of the waitresses are volunteers who wanted to be involved in the colorful fun.

A spokesperson for the bar said: "It was an original idea and the clients love it. It is very artistic and the girls do nothing more than ordinary waitresses."

But where do they put their 15 pieces of Flare?

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Don't MESS with Chuck E Cheese!

In Aurora, CO, Danon Gale looooooooves his Chuck E Cheese salad bar fixin's. As he filled his plate with wilted lettuce and flavorless tomatoes (and maybe even some Baco's Bacon Bits), restaurant employees confronted him and accused him of not paying for his food.

Danon became belligerent, and the cops were called. During the ensuing ruckus, the police whipped out their Tasers and stunned him to bring him down.

Parents at the kiddie restaurant are not amused. Perhaps witness Felicia Mayo, who was there with her 7 year old, put it best when she said, "They had no regard for the effect this would have on the kids. This is Chuck E. Cheese, you know."

Chuck E Cheese, indeed.

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Baby Falls into Septic Tank - Straight from the St. Petersburg Times

RIVERVIEW, Fla. - The 5-year-old twins knew something was wrong when the earth swallowed the baby. The adults knew something was wrong when the twins started screaming.
Two-year-old Isiaha Gatwood had stepped into the opening to a septic tank, dropping into 4 feet of effluent.
James Scofield, who stays with Isiaha's parents, and neighbor Perry Portee ran to the back yard of Portee's home to find out why Portee's daughter was screaming.
"The baby fell in the poopy hole," 5-year-old Tori Portee told them. By then, her twin sister, Taylor, was screaming, too.
Scofield, using a sledgehammer, broke open the hole, which was no bigger than a basketball. Portee jumped into the sludge, felt around for Isiaha and fished him out, Scofield said.


Tee hee. "The baby fell in the poopy hole." That's priceless.

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